limericks

Jul. 17th, 2014 07:34 pm
marnanel: (Default)
[personal profile] marnanel
Only yesterday I mentioned to Alice that I spent my first day in my school's Special Educational Needs Unit helping the teachers write limericks. In one of those weird synchronicity things, I found the limericks today in the back of a book of poetry, in Mrs Price's handwriting. Internal evidence dates it to 1987. I apologise to my siblings in general:

There was a young fellow called Thomas
Who always showed plenty of promise
At science he scored
At PE was bored
That flourishing artist called Thomas

There was a young fellow named Mark
Who went out for a bit of a lark
He jumped in the lake
While eating some cake
And got himself banned from the park

There was a young lady named Mandy (Amanda)
Whose favourite food was candy.
So into the shop
With a skip and a hop
She grabbed every sweet that was handy

There was a young fellow named Andrew
Who's now reached the great age of two.
He has two teddy bears.
They both live upstairs.
The real ones all live in the zoo.

Couplets and copulation

Date: 2014-07-18 07:27 am (UTC)
hairyears: Spilosoma viginica caterpillar: luxuriant white hair and a 'Dougal' face with antennae. Small, hairy, and venomous (Default)
From: [personal profile] hairyears
Limericks, oh dear...

The gift of a Limerick is that it imparts perfect comic timing to the weakest of jokes and puns, and works particularly well with obscenity.


http://j4.livejournal.com/342634.html

http://hairyears.livejournal.com/tag/limericks



Limericks work well with weak or abominably forced rhymes - but they don't work at all if the meter is wrong.

Remind me, some time, to Limerick the Rhythm Method.

Re: Couplets and copulation

Date: 2014-07-19 07:06 pm (UTC)
From: [personal profile] turkeyplucker
Good work on the Oxbridge thread there. I feel the need to expand it to Durham:

An innocent fresher at Castle
Received a mysterious parcel
Of handcuffs and chains,
Gags, dildos, and canes,
And things that you stick up your arse'le.

Re: Couplets and copulation

Date: 2014-07-19 07:17 pm (UTC)
From: [personal profile] turkeyplucker
A pretty young lady from Chad's
Was courted by numerous lads.
She'd let them caress her,
But trying to undress her
Would earn a swift kick to the nads.

ETA:
A charming young man from Hild-Bede
Was keen to help ladies in need.
"It's such a long way
Back to Hatfield," he'd say,
"Sleep here." And he'd soon have her treed.

Hatfield itself could be trickier.
Edited Date: 2014-07-19 07:44 pm (UTC)

Re: Couplets and copulation

Date: 2014-07-19 07:52 pm (UTC)
From: [personal profile] turkeyplucker
In a situation from which she could not extricate herself. I'm sure there are better (and probably ruder) alternatives.

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